This is one of those therapy posts, so read on if you dare.
I’m writing this to basically get these thoughts out of my head and down in front of me. I am prone to over thinking and definitely a worry wart (stop nodding your head Mama). The Big Dawg finally got a job, Hallelujah, we feel so immensely blessed right now. It’s good work, with benefits, great vacation time, and he loves it so yea that’s a big deal especially to a man living with ADHD. But this means dun dun dunnnnn
He has been the one at home with Little Monkey while I work, but now I have an opportunity to work part time instead of full time at the library. I go back and forth daily with this decision.
One side of me is saying, stay home, make the choice, love your choice. I’ll be teaching my son, taking care of our home and our entire family. I’ll relieve the stress of so many people I care about because I’ll be the one in the home taking care of things.
The other side of me is terrified that I will be judged harshly by others in my life. “She’s wasting that degree” “guess she just wants to watch Ellen all day” “She’ll get fat”. Oh, I make them sound worse than they are, but still sometimes it is a worry.
But who is it that really matters? My family, that's who. Can't women have it all?!