Tuesday, October 14, 2014

October is ADHD Awareness Month

Hey y'all! Once a year I always do a post for ADHD awareness. This year is no different. Click HERE and HERE for some great posters and quick info about ADHD. I thought today I would share with y'all the many reasons I love ADHD. 

I feel like ADHD gets a bad rap. When I met my husband, I was actually writing a paper about ADHD in my Abnormal Psychology class (favorite class at BYU). When he told me he had it, he did it timidly, like it was a deal breaker for us. He was ashamed, embarrassed, and he just knew I was going to stop talking to him once he stated those three words: "I have ADHD". Let's just say, he was treated poorly growing up for having ADHD, he was never taught how to use it as a strength. Only told how it was bad, only the bad, never the good.
But I didn't feel that way. I saw him for who he was, a nice guy, a kind man who cared about me. In my opinion, we are all a little crazy. This country was founded on crazy, right? Our ancestors came to this country searching for a better life, they were brave, they sailed the seven seas! Dare I say this beautiful country was founded by people just like my husband? Who have that drive? The imagination to think outside the box?! 

Reasons I love The Big Dawg's ADHD:

  • He is an amazing dad. Very hands on from the beginning. He loves our little boy and isn't embarrassed to cry about how in love with him he is!!
  • He keeps life fun and spicy!
  • His humor and totally out there comments (he is crazy funny).
  • His empathy towards youth. When The Big Dawg starts talking to them about past decisions and the lessons he has learned, their eyes get big and they really listen. I don't command their attention as well as he does, the youth love him and can relate to him.
  • He loves the outdoors, on the weekends we are always doing something outside even if it's just a walk.
  • Because of his ADHD, he is able to hyperfocus on a task he is really passionate about, his creativity allows him to see things in a way I never could. 
  • That leads me to his incredible artistic abilities. He received several awards in college for his art, we have his charcoals displayed in our home. Our goal for next year is to open an Etsy shop to begin selling his work!!! 
  • He lets me sign him up for whatever, whenever. I volunteer him for stuff allllll the time. It doesn't bother him, he likes keeping to a schedule. Structure and organization are the best things for people with ADHD. 
  • He is willing to learn. I've never met anybody as open and honest as The Big Dawg. Sometimes the honesty hurts, but he doesn't hold back on what he's thinking. It's always for the better. I am proud and so grateful that the communication and oneness in our marriage has created a united team! 
The Down Side

We had a huge adjustment period when we were first married. We fought. A. LOT. I'm talking screaming matches, slammed doors, sleepless nights, tears, and all.
Looking back, I can laugh at how dumb and misunderstood both of us were with our situation. We took on a lot those first couple of years. As we've gotten older and more mature, we've come to realize taking a step back is the best thing for both of us. There are times when we go several hours without speaking just to regroup and start back over. Remember me talking about the 15 min hug it out rule? That always helps.

The best book I can suggest for those married with ADHD is The ADHD Effect on Marriage by Melissa Orlov. I have my own copy and I have never understood The Big Dawg better than after reading her book.

ADHD has made me a more caring, selfless person. I've always prayed that the Lord would make me a more patient woman. ADHD can make people feel less than others, their self esteem is shot. So I encourage those of you reading this, who may know someone with ADHD to reach out to them and tell them all the things you love about them! The Big Dawg has a great personality, he has forced me to slow down and be more kind, forgiving, and patient.Throughout our marriage, I can see ways I can improve myself, better ways to serve, which helps me be a better neighbor, friend, and coworker. Together we make a great team. And together we are better people because of ADHD.

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