Thursday, August 15, 2013

Time Article: The Childfree Life

Time Magazine published an article in their August 12 issue that has many women on both sides of the issue expressing their opinion.

So I thought I'd add mine into the mix and would love to hear yours. Why not, right?
These are some thoughts I wanted to include from the article:

The article states recent statistics show a huge drop in women who are living a childfree life. 1 in 5 are currently childfree as compared to 1 in 10 in 1970.

With the feminist movement came many choices for women, including motherhood. Even more recently there is the more modern choice of being a working mom, having it all.

Because of this, women are turning on each other, as we all know we love to do. Why are women so catty? I didn't grow up with sisters and usually hung out with boys, so the drama that's all lost on me.

Now that we don't feel the social pressure to stay at home, women who decide not to have children are judged for making the choice. "Now we think it's her choice, so we can blame her."

The article goes further to state that based on a scientific study, women who are more intelligent are less likely to have children.

Women are more focused than ever to get higher education, seek out fulfilling careers, and "mother" the world through various careers.

A demographer asked college students from different parts of the country if they wanted to have children, most of the students raised their hands, but when asked why they had no response.

Alright, let's just dive right in!
  • I have always felt like it is a very personal choice to have children. I would rather see a couple who is truly ready to be parents commit to such a serious life experience than others who aren't really prepared emotionally, physically, financially (of course what can ever really prepare you?)

  • I am worried and saddened when I hear highly intelligent women are opting out of becoming mothers, mostly because they would probably make the best mothers!

  • With that said (and I certainly don't mean to offend) I am concerned when I see people in the news like the man who had 30 children with 11 different women. If intelligent people decide not to have children, but those who are dumber than dirt do, what will our society be like in 30 years?

  • With that said, I was rather disappointed in all the positives for a childfree life portrayed in the article, it felt like they were almost encouraging everybody to not procreate. They made it seem so lavish and left out how it would feel to be older without children, or the disappointment parents feel not being grandparents, or the thrill of going through the challenge of parenthood!

  • As I read, I felt like they were simply saying: Being a parent is hard, so why do hard things?! Just live a fun, care-free life, who cares?! And if that's the case, then why get an education? Why do anything really?

  • Of course being a parent is hard, but through hard things come amazing rewards and that was never mentioned in the article. If I skipped out on everything that was hard on my life, goodness I'd be living in a hole somewhere down by the river at this point!

  • I have never felt pressure from my family or society to have children. It is a pressure I put on myself. Growing up as an only child, I always wanted the experience of a big family, a noisy house, and lots of family interaction. At the end of my life, I want to be able to look around at all my children and grandchildren and feel like I brought good into the world. Hard workers, service oriented, character builders, and hopefully more than anything funny people!

  • It's never been a question if I would have children, it's just always been a when will I have children? I'm actually very thankful for our years of dealing with infertility, because during that time I've held a career that's challenged me in many ways, we've taken vacations, we've focused on ourselves during this time, so that one day in the future we can be the best parents for our little ones.

  • I hate that women without children are feeling judged for their decision. Having gone through the judgements and personal questions of dealing with infertility, I know how personal decisions can seemingly be ripped a part by the oddest comments. If their decision is to not have children, I support them in that, but I also would like to have that same respect for my own decision.

  • I hope that my parents see a little piece of themselves in me, whether it's that I look like my mom or am as sensitive or athletic as my dad, it's the fact that I've inherited their same demeanor. In my life, I would want the same for R and I. If anything, God forbid (we've been through enough, thank you very much) ever happened to us, it would be a comfort for me to know there was a mini R running around or a mini Whit, as scary as that sounds!
One final thought, then I'm done.

If that demographer had asked me why I want kids, I'd refer him to this post, because I think my answer is pretty clear.

Now, what say you?!